Covid journey and today

Covid journey and today

Dr. Krishna Murty
Subharti Medical College,
Meerut

How many of us will work with Covid patients willingly if we had an easy option of not doing it? Think about it for a moment and then you will understand my position. With God’s grace, my parent’s hard work and the blessings of so many people I am currently in a position where a lot of things come as an option for me. An option to accept any work or to out rightly ignore it or put it upon others to do.

I have the option of going late to the office, rather than not going at all but I choose to go early and work for as long as possible. I can choose any car to go to the office but I choose a simple bicycle because it is a more logical and eco-friendly way of covering small distances. I have the liberty of talking rudely to everyone but I choose to be polite because I believe that it is the options we choose for ourselves that define us and only what we are, remains with us till the end. Money, property, fame, and skill everything can go but what we are from within lasts forever.

When the covid pandemic arose I had the option of not going to the covid section. No one could have forced me. I did not even need to see the management of the covid section. The idea of staying back home came before me multiple times and there were some very strong reasons for it. I have beautiful little daughters, my mother is severely immunocompromised with metastatic malignancy, and my father was recovering from a life-threatening condition in which I had to work for almost 24 hours for the last 2-3 months. He too was immunocompromised and in a very bad state of health. Moreover, the covid disease was new, there was no standard treatment, being in the profession I am I can easily read between the lines of the various study reports and guidelines, it was clear that no one had any idea. There were so many healthcare workers becoming infected and perishing. I had so many reasons to opt out of it. Moreover, I had no one to push me into it. I was in a position to choose to put others before me.

On the other hand, senior doctors were backing out from their responsibilities, inexperienced juniors were being forced to work without proper guidance, and patients were struggling despite the extraordinarily best efforts put in by my juniors. I realized many times how wonderfully dedicated my juniors were towards these patients, putting in more than any doctor would routinely, working for 14 hours instead of 8-12 hours, crying when they lost a patient. My conscience did not permit me anymore. It was time to go where all the action is happening. If my juniors are at risk I had no business staying back is what struck me.

I started going to the covid section, started looking into patient care, understanding how differently this disease was presented as compared to other viral cases of pneumonia, I also took upon myself to manage the resources and the overall management of the section. There was a core team of very capable fellow workers who came along and helped from outside the section. We got encouragement from each other’s dedication. Although it struck me many times, many people advised me not to get involved in covid but I had to listen to only one person that was inside me. Although this is not uncommon for me there were so many days when I got no sleep or 1-2 hours sleep but not once did it struck me that I should rest. I think when we leave this world we will have enough time to rest, why rest now?

Meanwhile, inside the covid section, I choose not to wear gloves if other members did not have gloves. I put my team members, nursing officers, resident doctors, attendants and safai karamcharis before my self. My duty as a senior was to put my demands last in the scene of the scarcity of the resource. Many people in the core team did not understand this but that was ok for me. Slowly I realized that the PPEs were not helping; proper handwashing, a good N95 mask and not touching the face was all that it took to not get infected. Seeing me like this the other covid warriors got strength and I feel privileged to have witnessed the height of efforts that any human being (covid workers) can put in for another human being (patients).

I am a surgeon and there was very little scope of that in covid, however precise and unbiased observation and a longing to learn more kept me going. I learnt from everyone, nurses, respiratory medicine specialists, critical care specialists, cardiologists, nephrologists, general medicine specialists, psychiatrists, junior residents. Combined with my common sense and surgical sense this knowledge was like a key to any lock. Meanwhile, the posting of everyone else changed every 14 days but I did not get myself posted, who would have dared to post me? Neither did I get my posting removed. I just continued to do what I believed was my duty. There were times when it became very hard to continue. Whenever there was soreness in my throat I felt some amount of stress. Some ICU patients who had been talking to me for 4 days almost 3-4 times (I took rounds almost 3-4 times), who had become good friends, who believed I will save them and despite knowing their prognosis I did tell them that they will get well and go home in no time, collapsed in my arms. Young patients whose family used to ask me what will happen to the patient’s kids if he did not survive. I remember that a pregnant lady admitted in ICU kept on dipping in front of me and the equipment needed to save her was not being provided by the supplier due to unethical reasons. I did not go home that day and kept on wondering that how could I be so helpless. I had so many resources with me yet I was helpless and was just watching the lady go towards death. Suddenly something struck me; I jumped up, asked one of my fellow gynaecologists if we could operate to deliver the baby. Being the energetic person she is, within no time she arranged it and we delivered the baby in OT, alive and healthy. At least 1 life was saved. I devised something out of the waste and placed it in the oxygen delivery system of the mother and the saturation rose up from 65 to 90. Eventually, she went on a ventilator. Later we managed to bring her out of the venti after almost 10 days. All the patients were not so lucky and I remember almost all the patients I lost in covid by face.

So many nuisance creators took this time of pandemic to raise forged news, allegations attempt to disgrace etc. it felt strange what news making had turned into. Still, we answered and faced everything. More than me my covid team which is not trained to face this felt like giving up and quitting working in covid. Again it was my job to keep them boosted.

Now again came covid and in no time we had so many patients. Yet Again, I had the option of not doing any covid related work, especially considering the scarcity of resources. And yet Again I choose my duty above anything else. I was one of the most experienced senior doctors in covid who had seen almost 5000 patients in the last 1 year, devised many innovative techniques to save patients. If not me then who. However, despite everything, some people again found this delicate time to frame a conspiracy and I have to find the necessary legal cover. Even the conspiracy is of nuisance value.

The framing is based on the selling of injection Remdesivir. With a strong financial background, I would be the last person to do anything for a mere 20-30 thousand rupees. Moreover, I believe that if I or anyone else also had Remdesivir to spare the same would have been saved for my family, my children who were working in covid or for the members of the Subharti family?

Despite all the allegations and nonsense being published, I am surprised to find that the only thing in my mind is what will happen to the patients? Especially some serious patients who were hanging by a thread that I believed I could have salvaged. What will happen to the morale of the team if I am not there? What surprises me that I knew that some sort of framing of healthcare professionals is about to happen as they form easy targets, but I have no harsh feelings towards people doing it. This is what they are and that is not what I am.

Comments

No comments yet. Why don’t you start the discussion?

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *